We have been taught to chase after happiness. To find our calling and pursue a life full of meaning and joy through a job and a family. Our society is programmed to seek the positive and dismiss the negative. You have been taught that negative emotion means that something has gone wrong. But I’m here to tell you the negative feelings and emotions are at the same time good and neither good or bad.
What are emotions? Why are negative emotions good?
One might wonder for what purpose do we feel negative emotions. Aren’t they just a pain in the ass, here to trouble our lives for no reason? Well yeas, they are a pain in the ass, but they serve a great important role in out existance.
Negative emotions aren’t bad. Actually they aren’t even good, neither are positive emotions. Negative emotions are a contrast that is part of everyones life. You wouldn’t know positive emotions without the negative ones.
What our emotions are is a guidance system. They are here to tell us what we need to know about our thought prosesses and our actions. They guide you to the truth of who you are, what you want in life, what is true to you. Feeling negative emotion simply means that the thought you had (and then the action you took) is not in alignment with your true self. And what your true self is, is what you deep down want and need even tho you may have built a wall between you and the world in order to not get hurt.
Why do I think negative emotions are better than positive emotions? What are the benefits of “bad” emotions is that they show you what you dont want, what is not true. If you start thinking “I am not good enough” as an affirmation you will gradually feel worse and worse about yourself. Vice versa thinking “I am good enough” obviously makes us feel better about ourselves. That is an indication that the latter is closer to your true self, your essense. You can then start to heal that aspect of your being for more of a whole self.
What to do with negative (and positive) emotions?
What to do with your negative emotions is to see them, feel them, get to know them. Explore your negative emotions. Where in your body is the emotion? What does it feel like? Does it feel like it could have a shape or texture if you could see it? Know you are not your emotions and they are not forever, they just have a visit every now and then.
Although in a critical situation if you are for example suicidal and have suicidal thoughts it’s better to first seek help, focus on things that make you feel piece by piece ever so better and then after time, when you are ready, observe and deal with the negative emotions.
Furthermore from observing the emotions you can use them to heal yourself. By doing so you can heal parts of you that you didn’t notice were so so heavy on your body. It’s in essense about trauma healing. There is many different methods and no one is best for everybody, so I would advice to go with what resonates with you the best, what feels the best for you. You should also consider if soul healing is even the thing for you at this time. Sometimes the best thing to do is to look more into the positive and lift your mood up in a more physical way.
If you do decide to try healing work, you can for example do what is called shadow work. It’s about diving deep into the feeling and finding the root cause of that feeling, mostly from our childhood. Only but is that you have to be ready for the work, you have to bring your light (positivity, clarity, calmness, appreciation for yourself) with you to the shadow. I would recommend Teal Swans shadow work for this method.
Another method is called observation or neutrality. It’s the method munks most often use because of its effectness. When you are in an open space of just observing, a natural cleansing mechanism starts to kick in little by little. You can feel the emotion lifting to a better feeling state. In this you might get some insight on to the origin of the emotion that needs to be integrated. One of the many teachers of this method is Echart Tolle, one of my favorites.
You can look up more of these trauma healing methods, there are many to suit the many.
Bad emotions are trapped energy in your body, traumas from your past. Or they are atleast when you don’t let them go trough by resisting and pushing them away, really just burying them into your body to attract more similar events to the trauma to your life. (Btw trauma doesn’t have to be a ground braking happening in your life, it can be as “small” as not getting something you really wanted as a child, like going to a dance class.) So I do find it really important to observe and deal with your emotions, as it effects your life in many ways anyways. It might be painful but it will pass, all things passes in the end, for life is a fluent steam of information and emotion playing in our consciousness. But you don’t have to take it too seriously. It will only get better when you remember to make yourself feel good and to start this journey to your inner world of emotions.